Probability: noun likelihood of something happening
The past few days have been a whirlwind of emotions, ups and downs, and I promise that isn’t just the hormones talking. Where do I even start?
Let’s start with one of the most incredible things that has ever happened to us.
In previous posts I shared the Baby Steps Infertility Awareness Fun Run put on by Sarah’s Laughter. At the run we had 19 incredible members on our team on the day of the run and our friends and family helped us to raise just over $1,000 for Sarah’s Laughter. The event gave away a $500 grant, a $10,000 grant, and four free IVF cycles, one of which was donated by my clinic (Fertility Institute, Baton Rouge location – Dr. Dunaway).
The names were read off and a Samantha was called – I think we were all holding our breath but let out a sigh of disappointment when the last name wasn’t ours. But on the last drawing.. it happened! He actually read our name! I wish that I could describe how it felt. I was in shock, disbelief, awe, and it felt as if my legs had given out. I nearly fell to my knees, but still had to walk to the front! Taylor practically carried me as we went up. I didn’t know if I would be able to make it. I’ve watched the video (https://www.facebook.com/jasonforbus/videos/10209162710248142/ at 7:40) several times, just to make sure it really happened, and I’ve cried every time. The cycle that we won was actually for our clinic! This means we are being refunded what was already paid, and do not have to pay anything additional.
We had a 1.46% chance of winning. Only 1.46%. But it happened. We are so overwhelmingly grateful for Sarah’s Laughter and the Fertility Institute. You are changing our lives, and we have our friends and family to thank for supporting us and putting our name in the drawing.
I’m finally at the end of stimulation meds. It has certainly been a long, long, long nine days of stims. Luckily, after decreasing the dose of Lupron from 10 IU to 5 IU many of my symptoms eased up, primarily the insomnia and hot flashes, thank goodness. I started on 150 IU of Gonal-F and 75 units of Menopur until day 4, when I lowered by dose of Gonal-F to 100 IU per day. My mood has been something else though. I go from happy go lucky to ready to bury a body in 0.67 seconds. I figure that’s why my husband has been working until midnight every night and leaving before I wake up….
Here are my final scan results:
(1) 20 mm
(1) 18 mm
(1) 16 mm
(1) 15 mm
(1) 14 mm
(2) 12 mm
(2) 9 mm
(1) 7 mm
(1) 6 mm
(1) 5 mm
12 total on right
(1) 22 mm
(2) 21 mm
(1) 19 mm
(2) 18 mm
(1) 14 mm
(1) 13 mm
(1) 11 mm
(1) 9 mm
(3) 8 mm
(1) 6 mm
14 total on left
26 follicles total! So everything looks great to move forward with retrieval on Wednesday. I have a LOT of discomfort. I can feel my ovaries with Every. Single. Step. Of course I have allergies right now, and when I sneeze, it feels like my ovaries are going to explode.
Now that we’ve covered all of the good news, here’s the not so good news. When Jackie called me this afternoon to give me trigger instructions she also told me that Dr. Dunaway feels that I am very high risk for Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome (OHSS), so they are canceling our fresh embryo transfer and freezing all of the embryos. OHSS happens when your ovaries overreact to the fertility drugs. They may quickly swell to several times their normal size, and can sometimes leak fluid into the abdomen. About one in three women have mild symptoms (hence my bloating), one in 25 experience moderate symptoms, and one in 100 experience severe symptoms. It can cause rapid weight gain (40 pounds in two days), vomiting, blood clots, and other symptoms.
I understand avoiding OHSS. I don’t want it. But when I was going through possible scenarios in my head of what could go wrong, this isn’t something that I had considered. It’s been so hard to not get excited for all of this, but every time we get to check one box I’m just more anxious for the next.
I was devastated today when she told me that our transfer wouldn’t occur until the end of May or beginning of June. It’s just another change to the plan. I’m also terrified that our embryos (however many we have) won’t survive the freeze and thaw. I was heartbroken thinking of more probabilities. But then I think of our chances of winning the free IVF cycle. 1.46%. My chances of OHSS are higher than that. And our chances of a FET (frozen embryo transfer) being successful is WAY higher than that. So there is hope.
That means that we will continue to limp along down the infertility road a little longer.
But it’s the possibility that keeps me going, not the guarantee.
Fertility Treatment Running Cost:
Ovulation Kits for a year: $80
Pregnancy Tests for a year: $100
GYN Apt: $50
Semen Analysis: $175
Semen Analysis w/Urinanalysis: $250
Fertility Institute Consultation: $166 ($250 without insurance)
Clomid: $9.60 ($100 without insurance)
IUI Payment #1: $880
hCG trigger: $125
IUI Payment #2: $485
IVF Consult: $100
IVF Workup #1: $350
IVF Workup #2: $205
Infectious Disease Testing: $92
IVF Payment #1: $7,600
IVF Medications: $1,344
Sarah’s Laughter IVF Giveaway: ($7,600)
IVF Workup Balance: $196